I walked through the door into a
cool, crisp meadow in the midst of a winter thaw. Having never learned fancy tricks like being
able to tell the time of day by the location of the sun (pending this was
actually my sun), all I knew was that it was day. There was movement to my right and I turned
to see a small canid form trotting toward me, but it looked a little…off. As it drew nearer I realized it was a jackal
wearing the skin of a fox. Quickly, I
tried to think of what you’re supposed to do when you meet with a jackal. Wave your hands in the air and yell? No, that was bears. The Egyptians would suggest I offer up some beer, meat,
and myrrh. Perhaps being made of meat would help? I could spare a couple of fingers if it meant
reaching my husbands.
The jackal grew nearer and I could
see that it was black and either female or without sex. I’m pretty sure Anubis was all male, but
after a few thousand years, who could really be sure? The jackal stopped in front of me and
sat. As it looked up at me, I thought I
saw its eyes narrow with exasperation.
When it spoke, I was certain it had.
“I see they let you stay human,”
came the voice of my sister, the oldest of the eight children my parents bore. At 21 years my senior, she had died quite a few
years before I had.
“Is that good or bad?”
She shrugged. “Depends.
Having hands can be useful. So
can a strong sense of smell.”
I nodded then smiled a little. “So are you a jackal bitch because that’s
your true nature or because you didn’t draw so great from the hat?”
“I can very easily leave you here
to fend for yourself. I chose to come here to help you. Not everyone did.”
“I’d say guilt is a hell of a
motivator, but sociopaths can’t really feel guilt, can they?”
“I knew this was a bad idea.”
She turned and started to trot
off. I narrowed my eyes at her.
“Oh, I’m sorry, am I treating you
the same way you treat others? Fairness
was never in your wheelhouse, was it?”
She growled.
I smiled.
“Wait up.”
She growled again but stopped
moving. I fell in beside her and she
resumed walking again.
“So what killed you?” she asked.
“I’m sure a mix of heartbreak after
Ezo died and just being old.”
“Oz dead too?”
I nodded. “He died a few years ago. Heart attack.”
“I always figured Ezo would die
from that. Though Oz was always a little
high strung. What killed Ezo?”
“Cancer,” I said with a frown. “He’d had it for a while, but stuck it out
through sheer force of will until he just couldn’t do it anymore. I managed for a couple of years after that,
but it was just too much. I’d spent too
much of my life with him, with them. I
was ready to just be done with it.”
“What about your kids?”
I didn’t much care for her tone.
“My kids are fine. They know I love them. They also know they’re here—there—wherever—because
of the love I had with their fathers.
After all, I didn’t choose a physically abusive alcoholic to mate with.”
“You don’t have to be mean.”
“Neither do you.”
She trotted out of the meadow into
a lightly wooded forest and I followed after her. I realized that if she decided to run off,
she could probably outrun me with no problem.
I also knew she wouldn’t do that.
My sister was a lot of things and I knew full well she would complain
about it afterward, but she would help me.
Somewhere in her was the spark of my parents.
“You didn’t answer my question,” I
said. “Why are you a jackal?”
“I don’t know. The Powers just decide and they don’t answer
if you question them.”
“The Powers?” I looked around then looked up in the sky and
said loudly, “Oh, you mean The Grand Assholes who won’t let me see my husbands?”
Sharp teeth dug into my hand and pulled me down onto the forest floor
then stood over me, protective and waiting.
When nothing happened, my sister turned to me, her eyes blazing.
“What is wrong with you? Do you have any idea how dangerous that was?”
I looked at my hand, the holes in
it, the blood seeping out. Frowning, I
said, “This isn’t going to get infected, is it?”
“Forget about your hand. You can’t do that.”
“Do what?”
“Challenge The Powers like that.”
“What are they going to do? Kill me?”
“Yes. This is only one stage of many possible
stages. Our brother, Marc, challenged
them, and now he’s gone and I don’t know where he went.”
“For now, but he’ll fight for his
kids once they’re here.”
“Maybe.”
She let me stand up and we
continued on our way. The trees around
us were deciduous, but not any sort I’d seen before. There were thorny vines with large leaves scattered around. They reminded me of blackberry brambles, but
you couldn’t pay me to eat something out here without a breakdown of chemical
composition first. And, I wasn’t feeling
very hungry yet. It’s possible I
wouldn’t need to eat. Then again, I bled
and felt pain. My systems seemed to be
working and they would need something to resupply them eventually.
“So it seems like this doesn’t
really go along with any of the major religions of our world. Is it just where the nonbelievers go?”
“No. Theo and his wife are here. He’s dealing with it as well as can be
expected, but she’s not—which is no surprise.
She’s got him on some journey to find Jesus. They’re traveling with a group of people like
her. I told him to leave her, but you
know how henpecked our brothers are.”
I smiled a little. “Can’t imagine who taught them that was
normal.”
“Don’t blame everything on me
because I’m the oldest.”
She glared at me then pushed
forward. I followed, no idea where we
were going. Then I had a thought.
“Wait. You didn’t know Oz and Ezo were dead. How do
you know where we’re going?”
“I don’t. Not in that sense. I’m just going the way
that feels right.” She looked at me. “You’re intending to find them?”
“Of course. I have no intention of going through eternity
without them. I plan to find them then, when our kids die, find them and so
on.”
“And you think that will work?”
“I have no idea. But, I know Ezo and Oz found each other and I
know they’re looking for me. That’s a
start.”
“Are you sure they’re looking for
you?”
“Well, I had a vision and I’ve
never had a vision before.” I waved my
hand around. “I’m assuming The Bitches That Be provided it.”
She flinched and cast a wary eye
upwards. I started to tell her to not be
so paranoid when I heard movement in the woods behind us. She did, too, moving in a blur behind me,
teeth bared with a low growl. I looked
up at the sky narrowly, shaking my head, then slowly turned as well. A figure just a few inches taller than me
wearing what looked to be great wizards robes in deep purples and blues stepped
into our path. He held a staff in his
right hand, the fingers around it covered in ornate rings. His left hand came up to push his large hood
back and my jaw dropped.
“Felix?”
He gave me a big smile then looked
down at our sister and his dark eyes grew wide when they landed on the fox
around her.
“Why are you wearing Mom?”
Marianne avoided looking at me as
she lowered her head.
“The Powers sent her to another
plane. I was freezing. She told me to take her hide as she wasn’t
using it any longer. Grandma made a
shawl for me.”
Felix started to argue with her,
telling her she should have buried mom and that she was disgracing our mother
by wearing her like a jacket. I only half
heard their exchange. I was starting to
get angry again. Very angry. I looked up at the sky.
“Who the hell do you think you
are? What did she do to offend your oh
so sensitive sensibilities? Did she try
to find my dad? Did she try to find her
kids? Did she get pissed at you for
being a bunch of hiding behind the clouds assholes? What was it Bitches That Be? What was it?”
The ground started to give way
beneath me as I spoke and I could hear my brother and sister yelling for me to
shut up. Felix jumped for me, but he was
too late. The ground opened up and I
went in it. But, I didn’t scream. I was too pissed. My anger was permeating every cell of my
body. I wasn’t going to give the Bitches
any satisfaction. I’d already died
once. Took the oomph out of it. I’d given birth. I could handle pain. I didn’t care what they thought they would or
could throw at me, I wasn’t going to take it.
I raised both my arms in the air,
my hands in fists. Slowly, I extended my
middle fingers alone, aimed them upwards, and left them there as I fell.
No comments:
Post a Comment